EDIT: This post is long. I wrote it to get my thoughts and feelings out there. Please simply quietly skip over it if lots of words overwhelm you or if you don't care about what's going on in my life.
Just cleaned all of my rental furniture so that it's immaculate. It's getting picked up tomorrow by the rental company. After four years of use, it all looks surprisingly great. Then I vacuumed and steamed my floors. Gonna have to do it all over again once the furniture is gone to get to the places that were under the furniture.
Unfortunately, this means that between tomorrow and the 7th, I'll have to sleep on an air mattress and my only "furniture" will be a single foldout chair and a small foldout camping table. It's really going to suck. I'll also have to return my wifi router to Cox right before I leave, so I'll be without wifi for awhile, so no computer use; I'll have to entertain myself with my phone, which blows.
Still have to finish packing my second suitcase and my backpack/computer bag for my flight. And once I complete the 6 hour flight to Massachusetts, I'll have to spend a week or two in a bare apartment, sleeping on another air mattress until I am able buy a new bed/box spring/mattress and various other furniture like a couch, a TV table (my father is giving me his old, ultra nice 4K 65" Sony flat screen smart TV), a coffee table and I'll need a "project table" so that I can continue to film knot videos that can accommodate my tripod and lighting. I'll also have to get wifi installed ASAP.
My "stoke" is pretty burnt out at this point, but I'm so close to finally leaving AZ and returning home, where everything but the cost of living is way better. I'm going to try to get a job at Home Depot shortly after I move because I worked there previously for a few years and absolutely loved it.
Here, in AZ, I had been working at Whataburger, which completely sucked. Just left that job about a week ago after a few years. I LOVE customer service and working in a kitchen meant I basically only interacted with deep fryers at a ridiculously fast pace, endlessly. At Home Depot, I'll be able to work as a sales associate again, I'll be able to help customers again, and the pace isn't as fast.
Then, at some point, once I get my license back and get a vehicle, I'll maybe get a job doing tree work. I can start on the ground and work my way up to becoming a climber. Either that, or I'll stay at Home Depot and study videography/software editing at some kind of school on my days off so that I can do that professionally. I really haven't decided yet. Anyways, that's where my life is at right now. It's a lot to process, and, while it's important to have long term plans/goals, sometimes I have to take life one day, or even one moment, at a time so that I don't get overwhelmed.
I still struggle with urges to drink sometimes because it wasn't that long ago when I had a relapse and drank two pints of 100 proof vodka every day. Staying sober is easily my number one priority. My father, who is also a recovering alcoholic, currently has almost six months of sobriety, so I'm going to start going with him to AA meetings on a regular basis once I move. He's been extremely helpful over the course of this entire moving process; it's really nice to have my father back. When he was drinking he was pretty much useless and disengaged from my life almost entirely. But now we keep one another motivated and work together as a team daily.
Sorry for the wall of text. Just needed to get all of this out there. =-D