Christ Mick, do I have to write novel cause I'm not very good at writing a novel.
We had just finished the house and I was out working on the deck. I took a break, admiring my wood butchery skills and contemplating the meaning of life and chit. It was in the fall, no leaves on the trees. A few deer came running pass the house like their ass was on fire so I knew there was something or somebody in the woods in the direction they came from. I reach in the door and got my rifle so I could use the scope to see what the fuss was. About a quarter mile away I see these two hoodlums walking in my direction. The tract of land that borders us to west, north and east is owned by some lawyers in D.C., over 200 acres, so if I see someone on their land I know damn well it isn't the owners. I figured they were either lost, poaching or just out for a hike. I watched them a few more minutes and seen they had a rifle so I eased on down the hill where I figured they would walk past me, at least see who it was. Well they decided to cross my fence before they got to where I was sitting, came up over the hill and walked right past me. By this time I was laying on my back covered with leaves, they never knew I was anywhere around, I could still see'em tho. They walked straight to the house with me following behind them. The kid without the gun kicked the door in thinking nobody was home, my wife and 10 year old son was in the house. I was on the bottom step of the deck before they got in the house. Legally I could've put both of them down, but I didn't. Had the punk with the gun drop it and both of them were face down before the wife even got to the door. Had a shovel there I was digging holes for the deck posts, told'em come on boys, bring that shovel, ya got work to do.I looked at the wife and winked and said don't you dare call the cops.When the cops got there I thought I was going to jail, they had no sense of humor. The kids didn't get any time being minors. Their parents paid to fix the door.
The End