The Redneck Thread.

[Tom_Scheller]

The one lesson I took away with me from watching that show was that you MUST start eating right away.
Yumm!

3 minutes without oxygen
3 days without water

...and 30 days without food.

You do NOT need to eat right away. Your body is amazing at recycling itself. That's always made me angry watching that show. Why risk getting a debilitating intestinal disease by eating raw critters when, provided you have water, you absolutely don't need to.

TS

 

[MasterBlaster]

Mmmmm, BUGS!!!

 

[Frans]

3 minutes without oxygen
3 days without water

...and 30 days without food.

You do NOT need to eat right away. Your body is amazing at recycling itself. That's always made me angry watching that show. Why risk getting a debilitating intestinal disease by eating raw critters when, provided you have water, you absolutely don't need to.

TS

Thanks for the good info.
For a few years now, I thought I would like to take a class on survival. Now I am thinking it is even a better idea.

Maybe the spring class? We will see..

Thanks again, but I hope I am never in that situation

 

[Chisel Tooth]

Amerika, the redneck map.

 

[Blinky]

If you've ever burnt a tire on the hood of your car to keep the engine from freezing, you might be Canadian redneck.

 

[Burnham]

If you've ever burnt a tire on the hood of your car to keep the engine from freezing, you might be Canadian redneck.

No, no...under the engine works much better.

Uh...I have heard.

 

[Frans]

Why is it funny to make redneck jokes, but a criminal offense to make black people jokes?

 

[fishhuntcutwood]

Because it's their choice to be rednecks. And because being a redneck isn't a sterotype. They're rednecks because they have cars in their yard with a goat standing on the roof. We're not making any assumptions that just because they live in a trailer with beer cans strewn about the yard that they're a redneck....they just are rednecks plain and simple.

 

[sotc]

religion is the same were far to politically correct

 

[sawinredneck]

Because it's their choice to be rednecks. And because being a redneck isn't a sterotype. They're rednecks because they have cars in their yard with a goat standing on the roof. We're not making any assumptions that just because they live in a trailer with beer cans strewn about the yard that they're a redneck....they just are rednecks plain and simple.

Now what the crap kind of statement was that? I was born redneck, I was raised redneck, it's ingrained, it's not a choice!!!
No, it's not racist, but it's prejudicial just the same!! MAN, picking on people just because the way they are raised, and they don't know better because they are undereducated and nobody seems to care, but it's sure easy to take a pot shot at us isn't it?
Man, thats just sick!

 

[Blinky]

Why is it funny to make redneck jokes, but a criminal offense to make black people jokes?

Cuz most redneck jokes are funnier.

Truth is, redneck IS a stereotype and people certainly DO discriminate against us... er, umm... them. Nobody ever made slaves out of rednecks BECAUSE they were rednecks though. Let's face it, ALL jokes about stereotypes are in bad taste to someone... or they wouldn't be funny to the rest of us.

 

[lumberjack]

Why is it funny to make redneck jokes, but a criminal offense to make black people jokes?

It's against the law to tell black jokes in Cali?

Whaddya call 100 black dudes burried up to their forehead? Afro-turf.


You might be a redneck if you've ever mounted an extra axle under a severly overloaded trailer. You don't add the extra axle to increase load carrying capacity, it's added so when a tire blows, the spare is already mounted.

 

[The Branch Doctor]

Because it's their choice to be rednecks. And because being a redneck isn't a sterotype. They're rednecks because they have cars in their yard with a goat standing on the roof. We're not making any assumptions that just because they live in a trailer with beer cans strewn about the yard that they're a redneck....they just are rednecks plain and simple.

Yep, that's how it is Jeff! Redneck is as redneck does... that's why we're rednecks. Oops, I admitted I'm a redneck.

Oh well, red happens. On a scary note, if some kind of apocalypse ever comes about you know damn well the rednecks will out survive ALL the city folk so the future of humanity will be from redneck genes. Isn't that heart warming.

 

[lumberjack]

Cuz most redneck jokes are funnier.

Truth is, redneck IS a stereotype and people certainly DO discriminate against us... er, umm... them. Nobody ever made slaves out of rednecks BECAUSE they were rednecks though. Let's face it, ALL jokes about stereotypes are in bad taste to someone... or they wouldn't be funny to the rest of us.

The word slave came from the word Slav. Slavs were the white slaves of the Roman Empire (and later in history).

In theory "we've" all been slaves before. Get over it.

You might be a redneck if you were ever mowing your grass (burning it down apparently) and found a car.

You might be a redneck if any two guns you own cost more than the vehicle you drive.

You may be Red if you think it's perfectly reasonable to see how far the new tractor can drive through the freshly drained lake before becoming stuck as a couple of dogs.

You are Red if you've ever been to a family reunion and thought "damn, she's cute."

You are Red if you've ever seen how far your daily driven jeep can drive off in a lake before just to impress the female(s) in the vehicle with you with the end goal being A: you get stuck or B: you submarine it. (See picture at bottom)

You live in the Red if you've ever hit or nearly hit a cow while coming home from a girlfriend's house (no pics)

You are Red if you've ever given your wife a tractor for her birthday. You're Red as hell if the tractor was a year older than your wife. (no pics but it's outside)

You're red if immediately preceding a trip to the ER/veterinarian you've uttered the words "Hold my beer" or "Hey ya'll, watch 'is!"

You're Red and you live in the Red if your truck that's been stuck for the better part of a week has become the schools after school spectacle.

You're definitely Red if you've driven your tractor the gas station to fill it up. (See below)

You're Red if you've ever been pissed at Jeff Foxworthy for making money telling your life's stories.

You're Red if you take pics of your truck with the thought that it adds validity to your bragging rights.

Not in any order:

 

[OTGBOSTON]

On a scary note, if some kind of apocalypse ever comes about you know damn well the rednecks will out survive ALL the city folk so the future of humanity will be from redneck genes. Isn't that heart warming.

I've seen that movie, its call idiocracy.

 

[The Branch Doctor]

I've got 3 words for ya... Get 'er done!

 

[lumberjack]

Forgot: You're school is Red if the prom is held next to a Hotel that rents by the hour for logistical ease.

You may be Red if your town has an ordinance against "relations" in a vehicle and it's the most common reason for talking to the popo's.

You live in the Red if Bank's declare opening day a holiday.

Know what Redneck Chrome is? You're Red.

Your Red if you drove a vehicle that was too old to have a hands free cell phone holder put in at the cellular store, so instead, you fashion one yourself out of duck tape. Bonus points if it's on the steering wheel.

 

[JIML]

.........................

 

[Paul B]

LJ, that prom date of yours is a pretty gal!

 

[Chisel Tooth]

Some more Rednecks.

 

[fishhuntcutwood]

Now what the crap kind of statement was that? I was born redneck, I was raised redneck, it's ingrained, it's not a choice!!!
No, it's not racist, but it's prejudicial just the same!! MAN, picking on people just because the way they are raised, and they don't know better because they are undereducated and nobody seems to care, but it's sure easy to take a pot shot at us isn't it?
Man, thats just sick!

Hey man, I meant nothin' by it! I was born in the hills too my brother! People make fun of the way I talk, the fact that I've been noodlin', the fact that I've eaten squirrel brains, the fact that I had a shotgun when I was five, but never owned a BB gun, the fact I've never owned a truck without mud tires, I've been to LEGAL cockfights..... And yeah, I used "they" in my post, but that's because I don't live in Southern Indiana anymore, and I've not owned a beagle for a long time. I'm a refined redneck now. I haven't been in a state were noodlin' is legal since '99.

I meant no insult by it. But I stand by it, people make jokes about me because it's my choice to catch catfish with my bare hands. It's my choice to have camoflauge seat covers in my truck. It's my choice to keep my saws in my house. It's a lifestyle, and it's a choice. Nothin' wrong with being a redneck.

 

[Stumper]

.....and of course the original derivation of the term refers to sun exposure due to working out of doors. Even the most genteel of caucasian Treehousers cannot escape being a redneck. At its root it simply means white labourer. The term IS disparaging and dismissive but, praise God and His redneck children, hardworking white southerners (and everywhere else, thank you Jeff Foxworthy) gladly wear it as a badge of honor. Perhaps that explains some of the Psycology that causes many American negros to accept calling one another "(I've ran out of vocabulary)" while objecting to white people using that word. I don't mind being called a redneck by my fellow rednecks but someone who seemingly regards themself as above physical labour referencing me as such would obtain a cool reception.

 

[fishhuntcutwood]

Agreed Justin. I think maybe that's why Andy took exception to my post. I thought everyone here knew I was red. But maybe not, and he thought I was knocking it.

Sorry Andy! I still feel bad about rufflin' yer feathers.

 

[SkwerI]

Andy's feathers need ruffling once in a while.

 

[Frans]

I think it is different here where I live in occupied mexico (ca.) Here whitey is a true minority.