Customers say the darnest things!

Busy road, near a college town, tons of people on bicycles. Had 2 women ride by after we sucked an entire big cedar tree through the chipper. They looked at each other and said "Smells like Christmas". Struck me as funny.
 
"smells like christmas" thats a great customer qoute.

one of my fav's is "what ya'll doin with that wood":/: or "while your here":what: ...
 
I was doing some cleanup on a job at a Steiner School, (definately not a "tree killer" friendly school) with a power broom. There was serious discussion amongst the little ones as to what kind of tool I was running. My favorites where "saw chain" and "steam roller".


Dave
 
Nah... it would have to be, "What you got back there? Is that double grind or triple grind?" :lol:
 
I was working the ropes for a friend of mine on one of the coldest tee jobs I've ever been on. The sun didn't hit this spot until almost noon. The customer had a great sense of humor, once he was up and restored his coffee levels to operating levels. It was about ten AM, a little too early for him to be up. We had shut down the saws for a minute when he opens his upstairs window, hair standing about straight up, looking very groggy. Picture a sixty year old Chris Farley with coke bottle glasses after a three day bender. "Can't a guy get a little F'n beauty sleep around here?, I'm going to look like hell at the office!":lol: Somehow I didn't think he was going to be lookin' to good at the office anyway.:roll:


Dave
 
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  • #32
Just thought of another.....


This spring I bought a Vermeer 600tx mini skid. I had it on a job when a bystander told us 'boy, that sure is a cute machine' :what:

Lots of people say things to the effect - that sure comes in handy, doesnt it?
 
One of my favorites was the time I was up in an oak pruning out mistletoe. It was winter, so the tree had no leaves and the mistletoe was very prominent. I was about halfway finished when the elderly customers son came home and started ranting about what an f'ing moron I was for cutting all the live branches and leaving all the "dead" ones. I just shook my head and ignored him.

Another time a neighbor came home and started screaming at me because sawdust was blowing onto her lawn. I told her I would do my best to make it fall the other way and that seemed to satisfy her.
 
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  • #34
on the sawdust,I had a neighbor lady bitchin ab out the dust falling in her swimming pool and wanted me to clean it. I told her sorry, i was a tree man, not a pool man. (she didnt like that one)
 
This was real funny to me,

We were working at a customer that was not happy with us being there, said no at first, then the boss told him we were going to trim. The guy was a doctor. The chip boys were cleaning up and the doctor was watching them shove brush in the chipper. He was looking the chipper over real good, then finally asked where the brush went once it was shoved in the chipper :D um you missed the part where it shot in the back of the truck.
 
JIML said:
um you missed the part where it shot in the back of the truck.
Click to expand...


OMG. I had a lady ask me the same thing. I wanted to say something sarcastic, but I bit my tongue and politely said, "in the back of the truck."
 
I hate it when you are working on a tree for a couple of hours (just trimming). Here you have spent a considerable amount of time making a huge improvement on the tree and the neighbor comes out of the house and asks, "You taking that thing down?":what:

I usually say, "Would you like me to?" :lol: Or I say, "Naw. If I were taking it down it would have been done by now.":)
 
Where does the brush go?

I want a chipper with a small singularity in it and everything that is fed into it stays in it and never comes out. I could paint a line on the infeed and call it the event horizon and inform the ground guys that everything that passes that line is gone forever so watch your fingers. Containment fields might give me some trouble and there could be some liability issues if you happen to lose the singularity through the earth's crust but it would be cool to have a chipper with no chute.
 
I had an old lady come over to my groundie and ask "Oh Lord, is he gonna die up there?" and Mikey assured her in his kindest voice "Oh no ma'am, we're professionals. We do this everyday." So she continues to watch for a few moments and then says "Well good, that'd be a hell of a mess.". And she turned around and walked back in the house.

So when I asked what they were talking about Mikey had to take a minute to stop laughing before saying "She said don't die cause it'll make a mess."
 
It's been an anthem ever since then. Mikey (my groudie) will wait till I'm way up there and then he'll stop everything to get my attention and say "Hey Jay, don't make a mess dude.":lol:

Makes me roll every time.
 
This is by far one of the best threads I have ever read!!!

I actually had a "while you are here" clause written into my bid sheets!!

"I am not liable, and I will charge you extra, if you or you're spouse comes and asks me to do above and beyond what I have bid. If I am told to do it, no price will be disscused, it will be figured and added accordingly. If it is disscused, I will figure a number and give you another bid."

People will suck you dry with that crap!!!
 
I recall a customers neighbor who stepped out their back door and noticed me 45' up in a tree. We chatted a bit before I got back to work and she asked if I needed anything. Jokingly I replied, "could you bring me up a glass of water"! She said, "sure I'll be right back".

The puzzled expression on her face was priceless after she returned with that glass of water in her hand looking up at me! :lol:

HC
 
Ive had people ask me if they will die if kite string gets on the power line, (the commercials on the radio say it will kill you). All I tell them is stay away from the line, even if its laying on the ground. ive never flown a kite :D
 
People always ask how we bid jobs I tell them by the job.Reason being that they call about this giant tree and its like 30 ft tall or they say they have this little tree and its huge so we just have to look at it as im sure most of you here do the same. every one looks at them different my father looks at one then I look at it we both have different ideas about it we usually take the best of both if we can it works out great.most of the time.....
 
Lookey Loo "What are you doing for Mr. X?"
Stumper "Removing that tree."
Lookey Loo "Is it dying?"
Stumper "Yes. Today."
 
stumper hello, your post reminds me of a story we were removing a very old elm tree in St.Johns stumper you know the area. well it was a histrioc tree it had a sign the works well it was falling apart bad big branches falling off it was just done it was rotten and dangerous well we were cutting it down and people were driving by yelling all kinda mean stuff at us well one guy drives by and he is yelling out of his car that tree is part of our history.! well the guy that works for us yells back yep its history now!!!!
 
i had one on my answering machine yesterday. "our large tree fell over and theres still a few roots intact, wed like to save it" :)
 
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