The Joke/Funny Pic/Video Thread

A hunter goes to the forest. He sees a bear and fires at it, but misses. The bear is nowhere to be seen.

Suddenly the bear taps him on his shoulder and says, "You tried to kill me, either I'll kill you or pull down your trousers and let me frig you". The man chose life.

He goes home embarrassed, buys a bigger gun and goes back to hunt the bear. He sees it at a distance, fires, misses, the bear disappears in the thick brush only to pop up behind him a little later. The bear recognizes the hunter and says, "You know the choices."

The hunter, after being frigged again, brings a bazooka to get over his humiliation. He finds the bear, fires and falls back due to recoil. The smoke clears and the bear is standing over him, rubbing it's chin. "You don't come here for hunting, do you?"
 
Picture, if you will, Pennsylvania around 1710. A Quaker hears a strange
noise in the middle of the night. He investigates with his trusty musket and encounters a thug
about to leave with his few valuable possessions.
The thug takes a few steps towards the Quaker with a small knife and the Quaker levels his
musket between the thug’s eyes.
“Ha, good bluff Quaker” said the thug. “but you are not about to shoot me. Quakers do not take
life”. The Quaker only smiled a little smile and replied “I would not shoot thee for the world dear
friend. Unfortunately, thou art standing where I am about to shoot”.
 
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