I'm with Stig here. The boys doing all the boasting about speed are round filing for sure--not that there's something wrong with that, it's just that I've recently become persuaded (and this probably betrays a Magnus-like eccentricity) that the cutting performance of the square file, over the long run, so vastly out-performs the round grind, that everyone should at least have a go at learning it. Sure the learning curve sucks, but in the end, the chips fly like nothing else, and the cuts are much, much straighter.
I don't believe that there is even a square grind disk out there that could even approximate the cutting speed of a hand square filed chain. The reason is that the double-bevel, and especially the "goof" file, can actually be efficiently worked at two different angles, while the grinder disk just has one. The idea is to first use a super steep or acute angle to effectually hollow the chisel out for better chip flow, and secondly to use the standard angle to put a tolerably durable angle on the edge of the cutter. Now those chains RIP!
Whose a bigger nerd: me or Magnus? (a man after my own heart!)
Winch: Start hand filing man. Don't worry. If you start to enjoy it, it doesn't necessarily mean that you'll wind up as big of a geek.