The Joke/Funny Pic/Video Thread

[Mick!]

You were in a psychiatric hospital, what did you expect?
Plus he had those two birds hanging on his every word, not so dumb.

 

[lxskllr]

While I was at the psych hospital, we were outside for recreation/smoke break, and these three people were talking (2 girls 1 guy). One guy says something about it being "the age of Aquarius" and, excited, one of the girls asked if he was into astrology. He told her, no, but that he was just really spiritual.

He then began to explain how, "back in 2022, a star exploded in the constellation of Aquarius" and it sent huge amounts of gamma rays out into the universe and towards Earth. "Now, in 2024, those gamma rays are finally reaching Earth and we are all absorbing those rays"

He said, "remember the Hulk? And how he got his super power from being hit with tons of gamma rays? All of us who have our eyes open are now getting stronger because of the gamma rays. There are three types people in this world: Asleep, awake, and woke and, those who are woke have entered the Age of Aquarius and these rays from above will begin making healthier and smarter and faster and help them heal, etc. Me? I'm woke as frig!"

Bear in mind that this guy was in the hospital for a detox and he did not seem mentally ill, he was just a complete moron.

I was standing right there and I couldn't help myself and I said, "Gamma rays cause cancer, radiation poisoning, and birth defects."

He quickly pushed that logic to the side, saying "those aren't the gamma rays I'm talking about, dude."

"But there's only one kind gamma ray and it's a type of radiation. It's what killed people in Chernobyl, and after Japan was bombed during WWII, it poisons people who work in Uranium mines, etc." He got visibly annoyed with me and told me I didn't know what I was talking about.

I then told him that "the Earth is getting constantly bombarded with gamma rays every single day. Mostly from nearby magnetars and pulsars" But yes, I admitted, that a star exploding (a supernova) emits gamma radiation as well. I explained how, "the Earth's atmosphere blocks most gamma rays out due to them having a shorter wavelength than even light."

He then told me that I'm "clearly not one of the woke ones and that [I'm] still asleep." I told him he was an idiot and walked over to another part of the outdoor area, barely able to keep myself from laughing uncontrollably after what I just witnessed. He and those girls then spent the remaining 15 minutes of outdoor time discussing some pretty out there shit, with none of it having any proven truth to it.

He was easily the dumbest person I've met in a long time.

That went from an interesting bit of trivia and word play to crazy town in about two seconds :^D

 

[Kaveman]

Takes longer than two years for light from the constellation of Aquarius to reach earth. So his math is off from the start...

A quick Google search revealed that the nearest point of the system is 2000 light-years away, and stretches to as far away as 30,000 light-years. Thus, it would take 2000 years at a minimum for us to notice a dying star in that system.

Maths.

 

[Knotorious]

Takes longer than two years for light from the constellation of Aquarius to reach earth. So his math is off from the start...

A quick Google search revealed that the nearest point of the system is 2000 light-years away, and stretches to as far away as 30,000 light-years. Thus, it would take 2000 years at a minimum for us to notice a dying star in that system.

Maths.

Haha, I caught onto that as well, but decided to focus on his unfounded theory that gamma rays are in some way healthy and showering the Earth thanks to a nameless star within the constellation of Aquarius. The only beneficial way in which gamma radiation is used is for targeting tumors/masses in cancer patients. However, there exists absolutely no healthy or safe way to expose oneself to gamma radiation and getting those cancer treatments are considered a lesser evil than not irradiating a cancerous tumors with very low amounts of gamma rays. For someone to actually believe that gamma radiation has health benefits was absolutely mind blowing to me. People like him are dangerous to society and I hope he, and anyone like him who freely tout fallacies as truths, get purged by natural selection. Preferably as quickly and swiftly as humanly possible.

 

[lxskllr]

Space is really frustrating. There's all kinds of cool shit out there, but it's impossible to check it out up close. The Voyagers have been flying almost 50 years. They /just/ left the solar system, and are about 1 light day away. Next closest star system is about 4 light *years* away. So... 365*50*4=73,000 years. I'll keep the light on for you...

 

[lxskllr]

 

[CurSedVoyce]

 

[CurSedVoyce]

 

[Treeaddict]

While I was at the psych hospital, we were outside for recreation/smoke break, and these three people were talking (2 girls 1 guy). One guy says something about it being "the age of Aquarius" and, excited, one of the girls asked if he was into astrology. He told her, no, but that he was just really spiritual.

He then began to explain how, "back in 2022, a star exploded in the constellation of Aquarius" and it sent huge amounts of gamma rays out into the universe and towards Earth. "Now, in 2024, those gamma rays are finally reaching Earth and we are all absorbing those rays"

He said, "remember the Hulk? And how he got his super power from being hit with tons of gamma rays? All of us who have our eyes open are now getting stronger because of the gamma rays. There are three types people in this world: Asleep, awake, and woke and, those who are woke have entered the Age of Aquarius and these rays from above will begin making healthier and smarter and faster and help them heal, etc. Me? I'm woke as frig!"

Bear in mind that this guy was in the hospital for a detox and he did not seem mentally ill, he was just a complete moron.

I was standing right there and I couldn't help myself and I said, "Gamma rays cause cancer, radiation poisoning, and birth defects."

He quickly pushed that logic to the side, saying "those aren't the gamma rays I'm talking about, dude."

"But there's only one kind gamma ray and it's a type of radiation. It's what killed people in Chernobyl, and after Japan was bombed during WWII, it poisons people who work in Uranium mines, etc." He got visibly annoyed with me and told me I didn't know what I was talking about.

I then told him that "the Earth is getting constantly bombarded with gamma rays every single day. Mostly from nearby magnetars and pulsars" But yes, I admitted, that a star exploding (a supernova) emits gamma radiation as well. I explained how, "the Earth's atmosphere blocks most gamma rays out due to them having a shorter wavelength than even light."

He then told me that I'm "clearly not one of the woke ones and that [I'm] still asleep." I told him he was an idiot and walked over to another part of the outdoor area, barely able to keep myself from laughing uncontrollably after what I just witnessed. He and those girls then spent the remaining 15 minutes of outdoor time discussing some pretty out there shit, with none of it having any proven truth to it.

He was easily the dumbest person I've met in a long time.

I hope that guy doesn’t vote!

 

[Treeaddict]

Takes longer than two years for light from the constellation of Aquarius to reach earth. So his math is off from the start...

A quick Google search revealed that the nearest point of the system is 2000 light-years away, and stretches to as far away as 30,000 light-years. Thus, it would take 2000 years at a minimum for us to notice a dying star in that system.

Maths.

I gotz won wurd for ewe their buddy! Worm holes. Yup! Worm holes! Dats howl da light gotz dare sow fast! Dem gramma rays is makin me smart and woke.

 

[lxskllr]

I worked with a guy that was almost killed by a jackhammer. He fell in a hole with his finger locked on the trigger, and it vibrated his guts apart. He also got hit by a traffic barrel, and it messed up his back. He was on lots of pills.

We got him on discount as part of a rehab\back to work thing with the government. He was a nice guy, a little dumb, but a good worker. He always did his best.

 

[CurSedVoyce]

Kinda like a guy that worked at a factory (a printing firm) that unclogged a mens room toilet with the factory supplied compressed air of over 120PSI.

 

[Tree09]

I can only imagine the human shaped silhouette on the wall

 

[SeanKroll]

In HS, working at a restaurant, a night time delivery driver was a day time plumber.

He tried to blow the grease traps out with CO2.

Really worked, but it blew sewage up like a ceiling hitting fountain through the floor drain in the office!

 

[cory]

 

[Tree09]

He's going to the buffet!

 

[lxskllr]

 

[lxskllr]

Somewhat related...

 

[CurSedVoyce]

 

[Maximalist]

 

[Steve Mack]

 

[Steve Mack]

 

[lxskllr]

 

[lxskllr]

 

[CurSedVoyce]