flushcut
TreeHouser
Try a distel hitch for lanyards...it's darned reliable. Grabs and releases great for lanyards, though too much grip for climb lines, in my experience.
Jed, you have to deal with pitch in your work...no friction hitch will survive and work regularly under those conditions. The bean counters are killing you there. Let's talk at the gtg...maybe I can help.
That sounds very sinister. Maybe, if you will a scene from the Godfather :what: